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Where Love Resides: Celebrating Ty and Terri Schenzel

February 2, 2016 Leave a comment

Where Love Resides: Celebrating Ty and Terri Schenzel
TY AND TERRI SCHENZEL
Laying a Foundation of Hope
Faith. Hope. Love. A Legacy.

I was privileged to write this Metro Magazine (http://www.spiritofomaha.com/Metro-Magazine/The-Magazine/) piece to commemorate the lives and works of the late Ty and Terri Schenzel as part of the pub’s Journeys series. The new issue is themed Loving Legacies: Love that Lingers, Love that Lasts. Anyone that knew the Schenzels know that they embodied love. The unconditional kind.

Laying a Foundation of Hope

©by Leo Adam Biga

Appearing in the February-March-April 2016 issue of Metro Magazine (http://www.spiritofomaha.com/Metro-Magazine/The-Magazine/)

 

Making community and conversation where you find it: Stuart Chittenden’s quest for connection now an exhibit

January 30, 2016 Leave a comment

 

When Stuart Chittenden couldn’t meaningfully connect with others in his adopted hometown of Omaha he and his wife Amy began hosting conversation salons in their Midtown home.  That led to Chittenden starting a business, Squishtalks.  And that led him to embark on a project, 830 Nebraska, that saw him travel the state to explore making community and conversation.  His photos and audio recordings of people he met and spoke with are now an exhibit.  I profiled Stuart and his project last fall for Metro Magazine and you can find that piece on this blog, leoadambiga.com.  Here is a new feature I’ve written on Stuart and the 830 project.  The story appears in the February 2016 issue of The Reader (www.thereader.com).

 

Stuart Chittenden

 

Making community and conversation where you find it

Stuart Chittenden’s quest for connection now an exhibit

©by Leo Adam Biga

Appearing in the February 2016 issue of The Reader (www.thereader.com)

Last August Stuart Chittenden traversed Neb. to test drive the idea that interpersonal communication is intrinsic to building community.

He called the project “A Couple of 830 Mile Long Conversations.” With support from Humanities Nebraska, the Nebraska Cultural Endowment,  the Omaha Creative Institute, plus Indie GoGo funding, he set out to meet Nebraskans where they are. He communed in bars, bakeries, cafes, outside storefronts, at campsites, farms, ranches, fairgrounds.

The Omaha resident intentionally went to the great wide open spaces that make up Nebraska to find the connective thread of community running through cities and towns, the Sand Hills, the Panhandle, the Bohemian Alps and the Platte River Valley.

Wherever he pitched his talking tent, people happened by and conversation ensued. He was both facilitator and participant. The photographs and audio recordings he made of these meet-ups, including the stories people told about their lives and communities, plus the trials, joys and lessons bound up in them, comprise a new interactive exhibition at the W. Dale Clark Library.

Simply titled 830 Nebraska, the exhibit is curated by Alex Priest.

It features 20 8” x10” photographs of the people and places documented. Viewers can also listen to audio excerpts from the conversations, thereby putting voices and words to faces.

Hitting the highway in search of something has a nomadic romance about it. But this was no existential On the Road personal freedom ride fueled by sex, drugs, rock ‘n’ roll. No, this was a buttoned-down ex-pat Brit in an RV following a pre-determined path, albeit open to some detours along the way. Some of the folks he documented were encountered in the natural flow things and others pre-selected.

That’s not to say Chittenden, whose day job is Chief Curiosity Officer at Omaha branding company David Day Associates, doesn’t harbor a bohemian soul. In terms of exploring conversation, he’s both creative entrepreneur and mad amateur social scientist. He’s fascinated by the power of dialogue. So much so he and his wife Amy hosted conversation salons in their mid-town home. The salons begat a business, Squishtalks, that sees him package conversation programs for clients. Through guided talk sessions he helps organizations navigate public and community concerns.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The exhibit culled from his 830 Nebraska experiment follows a series of statewide talks he’s given in which he’s shared his takeaways from the project, The Reader recently caught up with Chittenden to get a fresh take on what he found out there, what he brought back and how it’s all part of his own quixotic journey of self-discovery.

This serial daydreamer’s youth in Great Britain was preoccupied by flights of fancy, his reveries often revolving around the very American archetypes he tapped decades later.

The pull of the American West once led him to live in Colorado. Though he’s resided in Neb. several years, living in Omaha made him feel isolated from much of the state. His travels for the project confirmed the divide between Omaha-Lincoln and the greater rural reaches. If his urban origins and British accent put off folks, he didn’t sense it. Indeed, he found he received the same good vibrations he put out. Call it the law of attraction

“If you approach any environment with a sincere openness and willingness to appreciate someone else’s voice, if you’re open to them, then it is door opening,” he says.

In that same communal spirit he found no doors closed, but rather heaping doses of hospitality and conviviality, though some folks politely declined going on the record. Whether shooting the bull with the boys at the bakery or chewing the fat with the guys at the barbershop, he was welcomed as a friend, not a stranger, and people expressed appreciation for his interest and invitation to just talk.

“That affirmation has buttressed my belief that conversation is not only something of benefit to communities and individuals but that this is my calling.”

By intent and intuition, he got people to say what’s on their hearts and minds in regards to what makes community.

“The more people talked the more other elements started to come out that suggested to me that community is a paradox. From the outside, if you try to create it, that is a very difficult thing to do. Community instead is a deliberate individual choice to behave and do things in ways that invest in something that is not directly related to you.”

Chittenden found a mix of rural communities, ranging from vibrant  cultural enclaves such as Dannebrog to robust Western outposts such as Chadron, and bedraggled hamlets in between.

“I had this expectation that rural life would be decimated and somewhat tired and there are those towns that do appear to be in a position of uncertainty,” he says. “You can feel they’re in stasis. They don’t know what circumstances are going to do to them and so they feel in flux, tired a little bit.

“Then there are those other towns that aren’t allowing circumstances to dictate what happens, they are looking at the available resources they have – people or place or history or whatever – and managing those things in ways that make them sustainable.”

He says residents in remote places like Scottsbluff or Valentine “don’t have any other choice but to fix things or make things  – you do it for yourself or it doesn’t get done,” adding, “Several people demonstrated this zest for self-determination, for sustaining themselves and coming together as they need to as people. They credit that spirit to the legacy of the pioneers.”

For Chittenden, there are larger implications for what conversation and community can mean to certain underserved and underrepresented populations. In Wayne, Neb., for example, he spoke with an openly gay couple who run a business in town. They told Chittenden they find more acceptance there than they do among young professionals in Omaha, where they get the feeling they’re not taken seriously because of the stigma that paints rural denizens as unsophisticated. More pernicious yet, Chittenden says, are the silos erected by different groups to talk over each other, not to each other.

“The more I look around me in our community in Omaha and in communities across the nation I see increasing division and inequality and I am morally outraged by that situation. As offended as I am by all the various types of inequality I see, wrapped up in very casual stereotypes and bigotry to those people on the other side of the fence, I’ve begun to see that my contribution to the better health of our society is just to increase understanding of the other. And the way to do that is to engage people in conversation.

“You don’t have to like them, you don’t have to agree with them but if you can do anything to increase rapport and understanding, you’ve already taken very bold steps to a more cohesive society.”

He says as he’s come to accept his role as conversation starter or convener, he’s reminded of an old saying he once heard that goes, “the point about conversation is that it has no point.” Thus, he’ll tell you, the real fruits of an exchange only come when the parties forget ego or agenda and genuinely listen to each other. In a world starved for rich authentic content, it doesn’t get any richer or truer than that.

The exhibit, which runs through February 29, is in the Michael Phipps Gallery on the first floor of the downtown library, 215 South 15th Street. The show is open during normal library hours. For more details, visit http://omahalibrary.org/w-dale-clark-library or call 402-444-4800.

Follow this wayfaring conversationalist at https://www.facebook.com/stuart.chittenden.

Old Hollywood hand living in Omaha comes out of the shadows; Screenwriter John Kaye scripted ‘American Hot Wax’ and more

January 30, 2016 Leave a comment

You never who you might meet in your hometown.  Veteran Hollywood screenwriter and literary novelist John Kaye has lived under the radar in Omaha since late 2014 working on a new novel but he’s coming out of the shadows for a celebration of one of the movies he wrote, “American Hot Wax” (1978).  It’s the story of rock ‘n’ roll’s crossover from fringe race music to mainstream popularity courtesy DJ Alan Freed.  Kaye’s appearing at a Feb. 7 Film Stream screening.  Here is my short profile of Kaye in the February 2016 issue of The Reader (www.thereader.com).

 

 

John Kaye

 

 

Old Hollywood hand living in Omaha comes out of the shadows

Screenwriter John Kaye scripted ‘American Hot Wax’ and more

©by Leo Adam Biga

Appearing in the February 2016 issue of The Reader (www.thereader.com)

 

Omaha is the adopted home of veteran Hollywood screenwriter and literary novelist John Kaye, 74, whose memoirs are published by the Los Angeles Review of Books.

The mercurial Kaye came 17-months ago from northern California to work on a new novel (his third) and immerse himself “deep” in a fictional Omaha subplot.

“I wanted to take a risk with what I was doing. The best decision I made,” he said from his writing-reading perch at Wohlner’s in Mid-town.

It’s not the first time he’s used Omaha as workplace and muse. In the early 1990s he researched here for an Omaha character in his first novel. Decades earlier he passed through hitching cross country on a personal Beat adventure. That drop-out, tune-in odyssey led him to Jamaica until Uncle Sam called.

On Feb. 7 Film Streams will present a 1978 film he wrote, American Hot Wax, that tells the story of DJ Alan Freed, who introduced white audiences to rock ‘n’ roll. Until now Kaye’s kept a low profile here, but that changes when he does a Q&A after the 7 p.m. show.

Kaye grew up in a West Los Angeles malaise of stale Hollywood dreams. He entered the ferment of 1960s social rebellion as a UC Berkeley and University of Wisconsin (Madison) student. He served in the Marine Corps Reserves, where his Jewish, college-educated background made him a target.

This child of Old Hollywood and New Journalism, “inspired by the galvanizing youth culture thing,” indulged in the era’s excesses. He was a researcher for David Wolper Productions, where colleagues included William Friedkin and Walon Green. He was an underground journalist, a CBS censor and a producer-writer for the KNBC late night sketch comedy show Lohman and Barkley. Anticipating Saturday Night Live, the show sped the careers of Barry Levinson, Craig T. Nelson and John Amos.

“It was a fascinating moment.”

 

American Hot Wax

 

 

Then Kaye got fired. Hedging that “disappointment” was the mentoring he received from Mission Impossible and Mannix creator Bruce Geller. Then Geller died in a plane crash.

Kaye’s ex-wife and first love was institutionalized, leaving him to raise their son. She later committed suicide.

“It was a very chaotic time,” he recalls.

All the while he wrote scripts but sold none.

“I was really struggling.”

One day he picked up two young women thumbing rides in L.A. He ditched them after realizing they were Manson girls – post-Charlie’s conviction. The incident sparked the idea for his first industry feature, Rafferty and the Gold Dust Twins (1975). This nihilistic screwball comedy is a shambling, anarchic take on three broken people hooking up for a road and head trip. Sally Kellerman and Mackenzie Phillips teamed with Alan Arkin. Dick Richards directed.

“It was a time when you could write a road movie,” Kaye says of its meandering, seriocomic style. The approach became his niche and hit its peak with Hot Wax. His friend Floyd Mutrux directed. Tim McIntyre, Fran Drescher, Jay Leno, Laraine Newman, Chuck Berry and Jerry Lee Lewis star.

 

[ WHERE THE BUFFALO ROAM POSTER ]

 

Kaye’s own counterculture leanings drew him to Gonzo hipster Hunter S. Thompson, whom he made the basis for his Where the Buffalo Roam (1980) script. Bill Murray plays Thompson. Kaye’s then-producing partner Art Linson directed. The serious take Kaye envisioned was hijacked by “a make it funny” decree from studio suits. Hanging out with Thompson in New Orleans, an old Kaye stomping ground, while placating moneymen hell-bent on laughs “turned out to be fun but really insane,” said Kaye.

Unkind reviews “singled out” Kaye’s writing. “It was a blood letting. Very painful.”

The experience, he said, gave him “thick skin” and taught him “not to be too invested in something.” Still he said, “It definitely set my career back.” He takes small consolation the movie has a cult following, even admitting, “I’m not sure it holds up as well as Hot Wax.”

 

[ RAFFERTY AND THE GOLD DUST TWINS POSTER ]

 

 

Kaye’s last screen credit came as writer-director of Forever Lulu, a 2000 film starring Melanie Griffith and Patrick Swayze.

“I decided I wanted to write sort of a valentine to my ex-wife.”

The lead characters have a college affair and years later she escapes a mental hospital to find her old beau, now married, to inform him he fathered a child she bore and was forced to give up for adoption. The pair set out to visit the son who doesn’t know they exist.

A negative trade review cost the film a theatrical release.

The producers, he said, “kind of left me alone,” adding, “It was a great experience for me because I really felt I had stepped out and done something.”

It’s the same feeling he had writing his first novel, Stars Screaming.

“Spending eight years writing this book and getting it done, I realized I would not quit on something and that I had it in me to write it. Even though I wrote myself into complete poverty doing it, I finished it. I stepped through enormous amounts of fear to work to my potential.”

Then came his second novel The Dead Circus. Even with his new novel nearly complete, he says he may linger on in Omaha awhile.

“I’ve fallen in love with this town.”

For tickets to the Feb. 7 screening, visit http://www.filmstreams.org.

 

Forever Lulu

Ty and Terri Schenzel: Laying a Foundation of Hope

January 28, 2016 1 comment

 

I was privileged to write this Metro Magazine (http://www.spiritofomaha.com/Metro-Magazine/The-Magazine/) piece to commemorate the lives and works of the late Ty and Terri Schenzel as part of the pub’s Journeys series.  The new issue is themed Loving Legacies: Love that Lingers, Love that Lasts.  Anyone that knew the Schenzels will tell you that the couple embodied love.  Upon reading this story a friend of the Schenzels, named Ivy Jackson Ginn, posted, “Our best sentiments can never summate how much we loved and adored the Schenzels. Every day brings a new memory filled with laughter and fullness of life. They are irreplaceable and greatly loved by everyone they came in contact with. May each word bring joy and comfort over all who read them.” #carryingthebaton

 

 

 

 

Ty and Terri Schenzel: Laying a Foundation of Hope

Faith, Hope, Love, A Legacy

©by Leo Adam Biga

Appearing in the February-March-April 2016 issue of Metro Magazine (http://www.spiritofomaha.com/Metro-Magazine/The-Magazine/)

 

 

Where Love Resides

inspiring • compassionate • caring • loving • unconditional • dedicated • committed

When the shocking news of Ty and Terri Schenzel’s August 20 fatal automobile accident spread, it was as if the thousands whose lives they touched let out a collective gasp. Many questioned how this could occur to an admired couple whose gifts for engagement, invitation, acceptance and frivolity endeared them to many, A sentiment often expressed upon their passing is that they had the ability to make people feel a part of them even upon meeting for the first time.

This was not supposed to be how things ended for this golden, well-yoked pair, both popular pastors whose love affair began in seminary and never wavered in 30 years together. It seemed a cruel, premature exit for a duo who created a youth serving center and a marriage healing ministry founded and named after their core belief – Hope.

“When something like this happens there’s always questions like why and how could this happen,” says friend and fellow pastor Lincoln Murdoch. “They were getting ready to move into probably the sweetest time in their lives in ministry. These are questions that are never answered, especially when you consider how many marriages they would have impacted and saved through their ministry, and that makes it hard. But as I said at their funeral, we’re going to turn our why into thank you for knowing them, for being in our lives, for the influence they had on us and on so many others. We find some comfort when we go there with gratefulness.”

There is gratitude for all the work the Schenzels did at Trinity Church, where Ty was a youth minister, and the house of worship it transitioned into, Waypoint, where he was an associate pastor.

A ministry he and Terri developed out of Trinity led to their founding the Hope Center for Kids in North Omaha. There they leave behind not only a brick and mortar symbol of their community-based work but a thriving organization giving more and more at-risk youth the skills, services and resources needed for success.

At the October 2 annual Hope gala held in the CenturyLink Center Grand Ballroom, nearly 1,200 people attended and more than $600,000 was raised. It was direct confirmation of how far the Schenzels took what began as a vague dream in 1998. A video tribute and remarks by emcees and hosts paid homage to the Schenzels.

An earlier, much larger outpouring of love happened during the August 26 memorial service at Countryside Community Church, where 3,000-plus gathered to mourn their deaths and celebrate their lives. A pageant of people eulogized the Schenzels on that emotional occasion, when the loss was still fresh and raw. Speakers included the couple’s children, Emily, Annie, Tyler and Turner, along with old friends and colleagues.

 

 

 

 

 

Impact

In addition to their four children the Schenzels left behind two young grandchildren, with a third on the way. They left behind, too, scores of people they ministered to, worshiped with, counseled and advised. Their shared passion was helping people improve themselves and lead better lives.

‘They always had groups in their home they were leading, doing Bible studies with, mentoring,” Murdoch says. “You can’t just do that, you’ve got to have a gift to pull that off.”

Their legacy may also live on in the manuscripts each Schenzel was working on at the time of their deaths. The family is exploring their publication. Additionally, Ty left behind dozens of leather-bound journals he kept that could be a primer for faith, family and marriage.

The legacies left in the wake of their passing extend to countless friendships that came easily to the extroverted, fun-loving couple.

“I just miss the joy-filled friendship and the spontaneity of connecting,” Murdoch says, “and it was a real friendship formed over 35 years. They’re kind of rare nowadays and you don’t replace those.”

He referred to the times he and his wife spent with the Schenzels as “laughter therapy.”

“People loved being around them because within two minutes you were laughing. We loved getting together with them because if we were going through a hard time in ministry or in life we’d engage with them and laugh for a couple hours and feel a whole lot better by the end of the evening.”

Despite all the friendships they cultivated and the 24-7 demands of serving others, the three pillars of faith, marriage and family always came first for the Schenzels. That legacy lives on not only in the individuals they led to be born-again Christians, but in the way they raised their children and in the youth, family and marriage building work they did.

Murdoch always knew their wide impact but he was taken aback by the throng that came for their memorial. He was even more impressed by the fact they reached so many but still made family their priority.

“Yeah, really amazing, their influence was so wide. My wife and I were like, ‘Man, how did they have time to do that? How did they touch so many lives in the amount of years they had?’ They had this huge reach and yet amazingly enough they were able to give their family the best of themselves and everybody else got what was left over. But there was a lot left over. They were so engaged with their children, they spoke love and worth into their lives all the time.

“They had their values and priorities straight and they kept them straight. That’s a pretty rare thing nowadays. Even for well-intended people it’s tough to balance, especially in ministry because your job is never over. It can be like this black hole that never ends. But they were able to draw the boundaries they needed in their life. Great role models that way.”

 

 

Hope Center for Kids | Omaha, NE View Gallery »

 

 

 

Shining examples

The hurt of losing a couple that gave so much and had so much left to give runs deep but what consoles those who knew and loved the Schenzels is the assurance that they maximized their time on Earth.

Ivy Jackson was an original Hope staffer but she went back with the Schenzels before that – to when Ty did youth ministry at Trinity. If you knew one Schenzel, you knew the other. You became like family. She says their impact on her reflects how transformational a relationship with them could be.

“Everything Ty and Terri did, they were all in. You didn’t get half of them, you didn’t get a third of them, you got everything they were,” Jackson says. “Their legacy is that when you do find that thing you know you’ve been specifically made for – that’s something Ty was very big on –  you go in completely 100 percent and you do it well. Everything they did, they did well. They loved well, they ministered well, they laughed well. They did everything with all of their heart.

“They were all about what legacy will you leave in everything you do –when you kiss your children at night or talk to your spouse after a long day at work or engage with the checkout clerk at the grocery store.”

Because the Schenzels didn’t skimp on life, it makes their loss easier to accept, Jackson says.

“When you see everything they’d done up to this point you think to       yourself, It’s OK they’re gone because you didn’t see any holes in their lives. You couldn’t look back over their life together with regrets like, Oh, I wish Ty and Terri had a a better relationship with their kids or patched up that thing with so-and-so. They never left anything undone. So even though it’s hard to see them go and not be here…we know they lived life to the fullest. They could look at each other and say, ‘We did well.” I think that’s the legacy they leave to us – do it well, You love your children well, love your spouse well, and that’s what they did.”

The late couple’s eldest child, Emily Lanphier, agrees, saying, “They modeled well what it is to have a good life.”

“My parents were not perfect,” Lanphier adds, “but just authentically committed to their family. There wasn’t any double standard – like what you saw from the pulpit is what we experienced our whole life. There was a total authenticity and congruence. I think that is what made them so beloved because people sensed that when they met them. They were so genuine. Who they were is who they were to any person.”

Lincoln Murdoch says, “They were not pretentious, they were not overly spiritual in a religious kind of way and they were open with their lives, their marriage, their failures. They didn’t try to make you think they were something they weren’t and that’s endearing to anybody.”

Not long after being introduced to Ty Schenzel Level 3 Communication founder Mike Frank helped buy the former Boys and Girls Club building on North 20th Street as the Hope Center home. He only knew the Schenzels socially at first but then he got to experience their caring. That’s when he caught their vision.

“Ty was completely sincere, completely real,” Frank says. “He was guileless. And he was kind of geeky. He wasn’t like this really cool guy.  But his heart was really for the underdog, the disadvantaged and the hopeless. Terri just had a passion for living. She had a deep love for Ty and she was going to do everything she could to add to it. That was very contagious – that enthusiasm, that excitement.

“We became really close friends. Ty buried my youngest daughter and married my eldest daughter. He led my best friend to the Lord. Our lives were intertwined pretty deeply. When I was around Ty he made me be better because he was so in love with his wife and with Jesus. He was so passionate about the disadvantaged and so excited to serve and he called me up to be a better man.”

He says he carries with him the Schenzels’ example of “how to walk the talk.”

Emily Lanphier says her parents exemplified good living to everyone they came in contact with and that extended to her and her siblings.

“Their example of getting life right was such a gift to us because I think most people are trying to figure out how to do that, and we kind of know how that works. Not that life is perfect, we still have life issues, marriage is work and it takes a whole lot of effort. But it feels like we started out 10 steps ahead of everyone else in life just because of the kind of love we received growing up. All four of us are confident, we know who we are, we’re happy individuals.”

Nick Reuting and his wife Andria came under the Schenzels’ influence through the Hope Filled Marriage workshops Ty and Terri were making their ministry focus after stepping away from the Hope Center. Like everyone who came near their orbit, the Reutings got swept up in it.

“The image I’m left with is walking into their home, getting a hug from Ty, getting a hug from Terri, and the first things out of their mouth were, ‘How’s your heart, how’s your marriage?.’They were constant givers. They wanted to make sure you were all right, your marriage was all right. When you had a success there’d be such a joy in their faces,” Reuting says.

“They showed an example of what a healthy marriage looks like and what healthy commitment to work, to marriage and to faith looks like and how to balance that. They both freely admitted their own faults, which made it easier to accept that OK, I can make a mistake and it’s not the end of the world – everything can be worked out.”

Reuting and others have picked up where the Schenzels left off to continue the Hope Filled Marriage series.

He says he will miss the “warm loving feeling” that came with their radical hospitality.

“And I’m going to miss Terri’s cooking as well. She made a lot of lunches for me.”

 

 

 

 

Putting marriage and family first

Nurturing came naturally to the Schenzels, who never left any doubt they loved their kids.

“Even through our growing up we each had different times where we weren’t perfect kids and their loving commitment was so unconditional,” says Emily Lanphier. “They cared more about being connected to us as mom and dad than they did about us making the right choice. Our heart connection with them was really important.”

She says even with her parents’ busy schedules she and her siblings never felt neglected or shortchanged.

“They were incredibly intentional in making time for family. Sundays after church my mom would do lunch. There were different points during the week when we knew we were going to see them. They were really good at that.”

The kids maintained that closeness with them even in adulthood.

“When we had free time we would all want to spend it with our parents.

Like they were our friends, too. They loved being grandparents. My mom was actually present for the birth of both of my children. My dad was there with the second baby. That’s the kind of relationship we had. They were some of the most busy people I knew but my mom spent every Wednesday with me and the kids.

“I’m so grateful I got to know them as adults. When I’d see my mom she’d confide if she was struggling with something. She was so honest.

If she and my dad had a disagreement she’d acknowledge it without bashing him. They let you know life is messy. They would always say how hard they had to work on their marriage because they were so emotional, and my dad’s emotions would affect my mom, and her emotions would affect him, and they had to work through that.”

The vulnerability and transparency that friend and fellow minister Ron Dotzler referred to in an Omaha World-Herald commentary “was refreshing to see,” Lanphier says, “because it gives you a realistic perspective for relationships. It’s not like you’re perfect together and you never have any fights. No, you’re going to have to be so committed and love each other so much that you’re going to be willing to go through anything together.”

Lanphier admired that her parents made a rock solid commitment to staying together.

“When they were dating my dad said he told my mom, ‘Just so you know, if we decide to get married divorce will never be an option.’ And so they settled that even before they were engaged. They were like, We’re all in or we’re not going to do it.”

Ivy Jackson says the Schenzels embodied better than anyone she knows the basic values and principles for right living. She says their lives demonstrated that doing the right thing is both simple and hard.

“In my little circle when we talk about Ty and Terri it’s funny because all of the things we say sound like cliches, although they are hard to follow because they require intention and work. Ty and Terri almost seemed cheesy because they were so cliche but they had the fundamentals down and they did them well. That’s who they were. If they went down a list of morals, fundamentals, codes of how you live your life, they checked the box good. They were an inspiration.”

Jackson draws on that inspiration daily.

“Every day I wake up I am literally a changed person because I knew them. I cannot wait to do well, to love well. and I literally do that. Upon their passing I feel like that’s what I’m doing – I’m entering into what that meant in every sermon Ty said and what he did.”

Nick Reuting says Ty had a way of connecting with others.

“I thought of Ty as the best heart engineer you could think of. He could build a bridge from his heart to your heart quicker than anybody I’ve ever seen. There was immediate connection and give and take.”

Lincoln Murdoch says Terri had her own way of connecting.

“She loved to teach, she loved mentoring younger women. I think the ladies immediately felt this was a woman they could trust to open up their hearts to and that Terri would be a confidante.”

mentors • friends • parents • pastors • good shepherds

Good times and bad times

Not everything was hearts and roses for the Schenzels and the people they served.

Pastor Ed King was at Hope when “Ty didn’t know what he was doing but he knew he was supposed to do it.” They learned an inner city calling will have casualties when gangs rule some streets.

It angered the Schenzels so many lives were lost to gun violence and the metro seemed indifferent to it or tolerant of it.

“They felt the community needed to take more ownership in the inner city and what happens there,” daughter Emily Lanphier says. “They felt like this is our city, we should all be really upset that this is happening and do something to change it.”

Some kids the Schenzels served were lost in the carnage.

Fittingly for a mission called Hope, Schenzel held hope the center  positively changed lives.

“My dad always said he dreamed about a day when it was not just funerals but weddings, graduations, kids going to college and on mission trips all over the world, which did happen before he died. It’s so great to know he saw that in his lifetime – those tangible expressions of the difference the Hope Center made,” Lanphier says.

“The longer the Hope Employment and Learning Academy was around, more and more kids were graduating high school and going to college. That was huge for him.”

Ed King says the good experiences far outweighed the bad.

“Over 20 plus years of friendship we got a chance to experience a lot – from some of our kids who didn’t make it, going to court, going to jail,  presiding over their funerals. Ty always would tell the kids the day was going to come when we’re going to perform your guys weddings and that most definitely came to pass – we had the privilege of co-officiating the wedding of a former Hope youth.”

 

 

 

 

A father’s heart, a mother’s heart

Lincoln Murdoch says the Schenzels’ “huge hearts as parents bled out all over the place, so when they were called to North Omaha they saw and loved these kids as their own and the kids felt it. Something that made their ministry so powerful is they genuinely embraced those kids and had them to their home. Parenting the next generation was very powerful in their hearts. Ty was a great spiritual surrogate father to a lot of guys. Terri was phenomenal from the maternal side. She was a parent to anybody who hung around them at all.”

It wasn’t only adults who sang the Schenzels praises at the gala. In a video kids delivered personal tributes about the difference Hope’s made in their lives. Kids went table to table to testify to their experience. Most powerfully, a group on stage took turns flipping over cards in sync with a singer-guitarist’s performance of “Beautiful Things.” Kid by kid, card by card, the messages transitioned from where they were (“stressed out,” depressed,” “angry and alone,” struggling in school”)  to where they’ve come – “I look forward to my future,” “I make my parents proud,” “I get better grades,” “I have really good friends,” “I am more happy,” “I have less pain and sorrow.” Then all the kids held up cards that read, “Thanks for giving us Hope.”

Lanphier says the fact her parents regarded Hope youth as their own made it even tougher when the streets claimed some of them.

“There were a few kids they had relationships with who got shot in gang activity and that always devastated them. The funerals were always really hard on them.”

She says those tragedies reinforced their commitment to the mission.

“My dad would say, ‘This is why we’re doing what we’re doing, this cannot continue.'”

 

 

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Unthinkable

Lanphier didn’t want to get the kind of news her folks got when people they cared about died. But she was the first of her siblings to learn her parents had lost their lives in a crash that also took the life of a family friend and of the driver of the truck that collided with their vehicle,

Authorities at the scene searched for hours to find identification in the remains of the fire that ignited after the head-on impact.

Emily recalls the horror of hearing the unimaginable:

“At 2:15 in the morning I heard a knock on my door. It freaked me out because my husband was away on a camping trip and I was home alone with my kids. My phone was on silent and I picked up and saw that the pastors at Waypoint. Matthew and Amanda (Anderson), were calling me. Amanda said, ‘Emily, come to the front door, we’re here.’ I was like, ‘What’s wrong?’ and she said, ‘You just need to come down.’ So I got dressed knowing something was really wrong.

“I opened the front door and there’s a police officer with Matthew and Amanda standing beside him. I thought, This is like in the movies, this is going to be really bad news.’ They came in and I was told by the officer what happened. A nightmare. And then I had to tell my siblings. It’s the worst, the worst. It’s bad to know but then when you have to tell people that’s like a whole other level of pain. I remember thinking, I cannot believe these words are coming out of my mouth.”

She prolonged sharing the news as long as possible.

“I actually waited to tell them. I decided to let them sleep because our lives were ruined and what difference would a few hours make.”

After the blur of memorial services and condolences, she posted an online remembrance of her parents that read in part:

“it is such a comfort to know their impact as i journey through this tunnel of grief. There are some moments I want to call them so bad and I feel like I might die from sadness but I keep digging and allowing myself to grieve and heal because I want to be the kind of parents they were.”

She says what “they put in me” provided the resiliency needed to work through the tragedy. She confides that in the immediate aftermath of her loss she didn’t feel so resilient until her training and kicked in.

“I remember thinking, Oh, my God, someone’s going to have to take care of my kids, my grief is incapacitating. And then all of a sudden I remembered, Are you kidding? I know exactly how I’m going to get through this – because everything I need to deal with this they’ve already given me. They prepared me my whole life how to be strong and to let my faith be the bedrock of who I am.”

She also learned from her folks it’s OK to feel your feelings and, if needed, to have a professional guide you through them.

“My parents were both highly emotional but they weren’t sufferers. They dealt with life and if they needed to get counseling they got counseling. It’s OK to be sad, it’s’ OK to need help.”

More profoundly yet, she and her siblings are all believers who know to call on their Higher Power for healing,

“Because this is the most pain I’ve ever felt in my life, I  know what to do and I can handle this because I have the Lord inside me.”

 

 

 

The tributes continued Wednesday for Ty and Terri Schenzel with a ceremony to unveil a commemorative street naming in their honor.

 

 

Moving on and carrying the torch

Lincoln Murdoch has a perspective on the tragedy that took Emily’s parents and his good friends just as they were transitioning from the Hope Center to their Hope Filled Marriage ministry and taking time out for themselves, too.

“It was almost like they put in 17 hard years at the Hope Center and the Lord said, Why don’t you take two or three months off, travel around, enjoy each other, and then I’m going to call you home. We just didn’t know what that would be.”

At their funeral he brandished a baton at the altar to symbolize taking on the vision of hope the Schenzels set forth.

“Being a runner I thought, Well, they left a big gap and they carried the baton and now somebody needs to pick it up. I challenged everybody there to take part of the baton Ty and Terri carried and let’s keep this vision going. It was a call for people to get involved.”

That call has resonated with friends and strangers as Murdoch and others have taken to carrying batons in races and other venues to bring awareness to the Hope Center mission.

“I had no idea the baton theme would kind of get a life of its own.”

It’s not so different than when the Schenzels left suburbia for the inner city on faith alone to plant seeds they never imagined would grow into such strong roots. What began with Ty and Terri as Johnny Appleseeds and Pied Pipers now has an army of soldiers following their lead in helping people bloom.

integrity • character • purpose-driven • faith-centered • family-focused • fun-loving

 

Visit http://www.hopecenterforkids.com and http://hopefilledmarriage.org.

 

 

Nelson Mandela School Adds Another Building Block to North Omaha’s Future

January 24, 2016 1 comment

If you know me or follow my work then you know I have a heart for North Omaha.  I grew up there.  Went to school there.  For a complex set of reasons having to do with how my life unfolded the first 42-plus years and North Omaha’s role in that, I found myself drawn to writing about some of the dynamics there – past and present.  I still do. I am for anything that has the potential to do good there and when I heard about the new Nelson Mandela Elementary School going into the former Blessed Sacrament campus on North 30th Street it certainly caught my attention.  Here is a story i recently did for Omaha Magazine (http://omahamagazine.com/) that gives a glimpse of the school through the perspective of two key people behind it, Susan Toohey and Dianne Lozier.

 

 

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The Nelson Mandela Way

New School Adds Another Building Block to North Omaha’s Future

Published in Omaha Magazine (http://omahamagazine.com/)

North Omaha may be reversing five decades of capital resources leaving the community with little else but social services coming in. Emerging business, housing, and community projects are spearheading a revitalization, and a new school with promise in its name, Nelson Mandela Elementary, is part of this turnaround.

The free, private school in the former Blessed Sacrament church and school on North 30th Street blends old and new. An addition housing the library and cafeteria joins the original structures. The sanctuary is now a gym with stained glass windows. Vintage stone walls and decorative arches create Harry Potteresque features. South African flag-inspired color schemes and Nelson Mandela-themed murals abound.

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The school that started with kindergarten and first grade and will add a grade each year is the vision of Dianne Seeman Lozier. Her husband, Allan Lozier, heads the Lozier store fixture manufacturing company that operates major north Omaha facilities. The couple’s Lozier Foundation supports Omaha Public Schools’ programs.

Their support is personal. They raised two grandsons who struggled to read as children. The odyssey to find effective remedies led Dianne Lozier to new approaches, such as the Spalding Method used at Mandela.

Mandela sets itself apart, too, using Singapore math, playing jazz and classical background music, requiring students to study violin, holding recess every 90 minutes, and having parents agree to volunteer. Mandela “scholars” take College for Kids classes at Metropolitan Community College’s Fort Omaha campus.

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It’s all in response to the high-poverty area the school serves, where low test scores prevail and families can’t always provide the enrichment kids need.

Most Mandela students are from single-parent homes. Sharon Moore loves sending her son, Garrett, to “a new school with new ideas.” Eric and Stacy Rafferty welcome the research-based innovations their boy, William, enjoys and the opportunity to be as involved as they want at school. Moore and the Raffertys report their sons are thriving there.

“Parents are really getting into this groove of being here,” says Principal Susan Toohey. “It’s building a community here and a sense that we are all in this together.”

Community is also important to the Loziers.

“We’re just really connected here,” Dianne Lozier says. “Allan and I have really strong beliefs that the economic inequality in the country and north Omaha is a microcosm of a huge issue. It’s a fairness issue and a belief that, if we want it badly enough, we can make a difference.”

She and Toohey are banking that the school demonstrates its strategies work as core curriculum, not just intervention.

“I’m hoping by the end of the first school year here we’ll be able to compare students’ literacy against other places and show that children have developed stronger reading skills,” Lozier says. “Our longterm goal is that all kids will be grade-level proficient readers by the end of third grade.”

For Toohey, launching and leading a school in a high-needs district is appealing.

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“What an incredible opportunity,” she says. “Rarely do you get a chance to start a school from the ground up and pick everything that’s going to happen there and hire every person that’s going to work there. I knew it was going to be a lot of work, but my heart has always been in urban education.”

In preparation for opening last August, she says, “I spent a year researching educational practices and curricula and developing relationships with people.” Her outreach forged partnerships with Metro, College of Saint Mary, the Omaha Conservatory of Music, The Big Garden, and others.

“We really want to be a model of what makes a school stronger, and I think having the community involved makes it stronger so it’s not working in isolation.”

Dianne Lozier, whose foundation funds the school with the William and Ruth Scott Family Foundation, is a frequent visitor.

NelsonMandelaSchool5“I help out with breakfast,” she explains. “I tie a lot of shoes. I get and give a lot of hugs.”

Lozier says her presence is meant to help “faculty and staff feel a little more supported—because this is hard. Every teacher and para-educator here, even the head of school, would say this is the hardest job they’ve ever had.”

Toohey says the difficulty stems from teaching a “very different curriculum” and “starting a culture from scratch. Families are getting to know us, we’re getting to know the families, and this is a really challenging population of kids. Many have not been in preschool programs that helped them moderate their behavior.”

Despite the challenges, Lozier says, “We have incredible families and kids.”

Drawing on the school’s inspirational namesake, each morning everyone recites “the Mandela mantra” of “Education is the most powerful weapon you can produce to change the world,” and “I will change the world with my hope, strength, service, unity, peace, and wisdom.”

“I hope all those things are what this community sees coming out of this school,” Toohey says, “and that our kids develop those qualities of grit and resilience so critical for success.”

Lozier adds that Mandela is a symbol of hope and opportunity.

“To accomplish the things we’re capable of,” she says, “we have to believe we can do that. It’s an opportunity to make improvements and get past impediments, to use internal strengths and be recognized for what you can bring.”

Visit nelsonmandelaelementary.org to learn more.

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Plains Living on a Mountainous Scale

January 6, 2016 Leave a comment

Jana Wheatley has the Colorado-style home she’s always wanted right here in Omaha.  Read my short Omaha Home Magazine (http://omahamagazine.com/category/publications/omaha-home/) feature about what makes this residence Jana’s dream place.

 

 

Plains Living on a Mountainous Scale

January 3, 2016
©Photography by Bill Sitzmann
Appearing in the January/February 2016 issue of Omaha Home Magazine (http://omahamagazine.com/category/publications/omaha-home/)

While driving towards Waterloo, Nebraska, Jana Wheatley came upon a sign reading “Live a more fluid life,” touting a coming residential lake community to be named West Shores. She longed to live in nature. Taking in the lake, the beach, and empty plots, she envisioned the Colorado lodge-style home she ended up building there.

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She and her now-ex bought the lakefront property in 2004. She served as general contractor for the build, subbing out jobs. Working with budgets and subs was old hat, as she owned a grounds management business with her then-husband.

She describes the resulting four-bedroom, four-bathroom, 6,000 square-foot house near the western limits of West Dodge Road as “comfy, rustic, chic,” adding, “We always kind of had an idea about what we wanted. I like simple. I don’t like foo-foo.”

Covenants prevented her from building with logs so she went with an exterior of cedar shingles and stone, and an interior with wide plank pine floors and ceilings, hickory cabinetry, granite counters, and variegated stone. The plaster walls are finished in a soft Texas leather. The rooms conform to her desire for “big, open, flowing spaces with natural light.” The living room, dining room, and kitchen open onto each other, and light from multiple windows brighten and soften the space.

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She likes the unfinished floors’ character in their flaws and scrapes.

“It’s worn but it shows it’s lived in, that people are having fun and it’s not a museum. I want people to enjoy themselves here.”

The living room has an unimpeded lake view through sliding glass doors that lead onto a south-facing deck running the full width of the house. Her bedroom opens onto the deck and its 180-degree view.

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“There’s nothing like watching the sunrise, and the sunset, and the geese flying over,” she says.

Her bathroom features a free-standing deep tub and a tall enclosed shower. The bathroom and kitchen plumbing fixtures are Industrial Age antique-inspired. The floors everywhere are warmed by an in-floor water heating system.

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Her love of nature is expressed in a mammoth antler horn chandelier fixed high above the living room. A slightly smaller antler art piece hangs from the ceiling above the staircase, connecting the main floor living area and the lower level rec area, where a miniature horn fixture crowns the billiards table.

The mantles above the two fireplaces continue the horn theme.

“It just says Colorado to me,” she says.

A hand-wrought iron chandelier sets off the kitchen island.

Her favorite space is a kitchen nook she calls “my little Indian corner” for its Native American wall art and traditional furniture designs.

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Southwestern-style pots and paintings add decorative flourishes.

The lower level offers more lake views.

“The house is like a frame to look outside and that’s what I end up doing—gazing outside.”

In the last 10 years she’s added a son and lost a husband but she still has her home.

“Can you tell it’s a labor of love? It’s a piece of me. It’s my dream. I’m having my Colorado right here.” OmahaHome

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Father Ken Vavrina Book Signing – Sunday, Jan. 3

December 28, 2015 Leave a comment

 

 

Sunday, January 3, 2016
at 10:30 AM – 12:00 PM
St Benedict The Moor, 2423 Grant Street, Omaha
Father Ken Vavrina will sign copies of his new book, “Crossing Bridges: A Priest’s Uplifting Life Among the Downtrodden,” from 10:30 a.m. to Noon on Sunday, Jan. 3 at St. Benedict the Moor Catholic Church, 2423 Grant Street, In North Omaha. The signing will take place in the social hall located in the church basement. The book chronicles Father’s inspiring life of service at home and abroad. As I helped Father Ken realize the book, I will be there as well. Come out and support Father Ken, a much beloved man of God and of the people whose ministry is both a testimony of faith and a call to action. This social justice champion has served parishes on reservtions and in Omaha’s inner city. He’s worked with lepers in Yemen and with the poorest of the poor in India. He’s aided war refugees in Liberia and earthquake surviors in Italy. He’s given all he has to give and now it’s time for the community to show its appreciation for this once close confidante and colleague of Mother Teresa.

Refreshments will be served. All are welcome. We hope to see you there.

 

 

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